heart.

Most of us have one or more core issues or challenges which surface repeatedly over the course of our lives. These issues are usually rooted in deep unexpressed fears. Depending on your perspective, core issues either cause all sorts of problems, or present many opportunities for transformation. When you choose to look at core issues as an opportunity, you are much more likely to transform your fears into learning tools which lead to a better life. Below are the most common core issues, their related fears, and suggestions for dealing with them.

Examples of Common Core Issues and Associated Fears
Abandonment – Nobody cares about me. I'm all alone. I don't matter.
Arrogance – I'm better than all of you. I'm too much. I'm right and you're wrong.
Damaged – Something is wrong with me. I'm a failure. I'm damaged.
Inferiority – I'm not good enough. I'm stupid. I'm worthless. I'm boring. I'm hopeless.
Rejection – I'm a burden. I'm unwanted. Nobody wants to spend time with me.

Our core issues often originate from childhood family scenarios. They can be a result of negative messages that were repeated many times to us by our parents or other significant people in our lives. Or one of these beliefs may have been driven deep into us during one or more traumatic experiences. Was one of the above statements drilled into you in your early years?
Note that some people are overcompensators. If you are in this category, you may unconsciously do everything you can to make it appear as if you are anything but your core issue. For instance, someone with inferiority as a core fear might outwardly appear very macho or domineering. Yet deep inside, this is covering up a fear of being inferior. A person dealing with shame may be overly nice and giving to cover up a fear that they are really bad. Particularly if you are having trouble finding a core issue, notice if any of your behavior is opposite of the core issues above.

Examples of Behavior of Overcompensators
Abandonment – Always need to be included, join everything to avoid deeper feelings.
Arrogance – Act very humble, hiding their deeper belief that no one can match them.
Damaged – Present themselves as always great, avoid talking about their problems.
Inferiority – Macho, domineering, need to prove they are better than others.
Rejection – Present themselves as incredibly desirable, yet reject others easily.

Whether you are an overcompensator or not, by exploring the deep, underlying fears of your core issues, you can transform your life for the better. Though you may find that you have more than one core issue, generally one will be more prominent than the others. Particularly if this is new to you, we highly recommend that you first focus on exploring your most prominent core issue. To deal with this core issue, you can design intentions to gradually shift this deeply ingrained fear.

Suggested Intentions for Transforming Fears, Core Issues
Abandonment – I am worthy of love. I can find ways to safely share myself with others.
Arrogance – I can learn from all around me. I can see goodness in everyone I meet.
Damaged – I am whole and complete just as I am. I can choose to love all of me.
Inferiority – I am a good, valuable person. I can make meaningful contributions.
Rejection – I am an attractive, interesting person. People can enjoy getting to know me.

No matter how much it hurts.